This Week in Blogs, Volume XII
Hi Friends. Thanks for stopping by. How was your week? Good…glad to hear it. Pretty good week here. To follow up on last week’s recap, I survived my meeting with the doctor on Wednesday. No horrible illnesses or diseases, so that’s cool. The doctor did say that he’d like to see me lose a little weight. To which I replied “yeah, me too.” I’m glad that I’m on the same page as my medical professional. See you next year, doctor. Enjoy the $25 copay.
I’m sorry to report that I won’t be posting next week. Actually, I’m not sorry at all. Kate and I are heading to Cabo for the next 10 days or so. I’ll have limited access to phone, email, and sobriety. Hmm, maybe I should put that as my out of office message. Nah…probably not. Might not have a job to come back to if I did that. Anyway, I doubt I’ll be spending a whole lot of time reading blogs in the next week or so. I’ll be back with my weekly recap on the 26th, as long as I don’t end up with Swine Flu or something.
Alright. One sort of funny story and then we’ll get to the blog review. Kate spent the last couple of evenings googling Gilbert’s dog breed (in between looking at all of your blogs, of course). Searches included: Shar Pei Rat Terrier, Rat Pei, and Shar Terrier. Then she’d find pictures of similar looking dogs, and would show them to Gilbert. Usually saying things like “Gilbert, come look at your sister.” Then she mentioned that she wanted to find Gilbert’s family so we could have a reunion. So totally joking, I recommended that she check out ancestry.com to find Gil’s relatives and then I went back to watching bad television. About ten minutes later, Kate says “I don’t think this is going to work…it’s just stuff about people and their ancestors.” Apparently she thought I was serious and had looked for Gilbert’s ancestors online. That was probably the highlight of my week. Okay, now time for the blog review.
Kelsey from Bites and Bowls has taken the top spot away from Hangry Pants, which means I got some free shiz. Kind of, but not really. Kelsey jacked one of my Smart Ones on Saturday night/Sunday morning, which you can read about in this post. To repay me, she brought over a box of Twilight-Inspired Conversation Hearts. They came in a box with the dreamy Edward Cullen on the package, and the hearts said things like “Bite Me” and “Live Forever.” They were delicious, even though it’s four months after their originally scheduled consumption date. So thanks B+B for the free shiz. In that post by Kelsey, you’ll notice that she and I sang karaoke backup to Matt last weekend on Nuthin’ But a G Thang. I volunteered to sing the Dre parts, which I thought meant I’d just say ‘hell yeah’ in a low voice over and over again. Turns out that Dre actually has a verse. Oh, and I also found out that if there’s a ‘radio friendly’ (or wal-mart friendly) version of a song, then that’s probably the version that the karaoke guy will have. I was singing the album version. So I’d like to apologize to the patrons of the Yellow Rose for my bad language, but I think I was singing the song in the way that Dre and Snoop wanted it to be sung. Except for the whole drunk white guy in a dive bar in suburban Charlotte North Carolina part. Hell yeah.
Emily at Super Caloric Chalk Dust tagged me in this post, which appears to be some kind of chain letter/post. I heart Super Caloric, but I’m not really a chain letter responder kind of guy, so I’m just going to talk about Emily and her blog and we’ll say that I’ve fulfilled my chain letter duties, okay? That way, if this is really some kind of scam, then I won’t be considered an accomplice. As far as I can tell, the only difference between a chain letter and a pyramid scheme is that nobody gets rich with a chain letter. People just end up giving personal details (like their lack of at home pants wearing) instead of ending up with mad loot. And for this chain blog thing to take off, they should probably include some threat of dismemberment or disfigurement. Those both seem like good motivators for old school chain letters. Like send a pair of flip flops to 10 of your best friends or else you’ll get the hiv or something. So I’m going to make my own rules instead. By being tagged, it means I should stop eating peaches, and should go on vacation and sit on the beach for a couple of weeks. Okay…sold.
Tina at Carrots ‘n’ Cake made some dong-shaped cupcakes in this post. At first I thought this was really out of character for the C ‘n’ C blogging factory. I mean she usually does nice things like pictures of parks in Boston and funny stories about Mal, and out of nowhere come these iced dongs. But then I read the post, and it turns out that it was part of a bachelorette weekend party thing. This makes sense. Bachelorette parties are one of only three scenarios where graphic depictions of man junk are socially acceptable. The others are junior high (sex ed class) and episodes of Oprah when Dr. Oz is the guest. That damn Dr. Oz is always talking about man bits. Speaking of sex ed…did I ever tell y’all that my dad was my sex ed teacher in Jr. High? I can’t remember if that was on this blog or another blog. Anyway, this is reason #1 why I haven’t been embarrassed since 7th grade. Nothing tops that. Nothing.
Speaking of wangs, Snackface made a pretty fantastic reference to Trey MacDougal’s flaccidity in this post. I know, this post is more than a week old, but it was probably the funniest thing that I read this week, and it’s my blog, so I’m making an exception and including it in the weekly roundup. Mostly because I’m planning on stealing this line and calling anything limp ‘Trey-Like’ from now on. We’ll see if it sticks. Cut to my favorite scene from Mean Girls when Regina George says ’stop trying to make fetch happen.’ Say what you want about LiLo, but Mean Girls is one of the best movies in the history of the world. Ever. And shame on me for just now writing about Snackface…there’s no excuse for that. I mean, she has SATC references in her posts, she attends Matt Lauer’s alma mater, and she hangs out with homegirl. How did it take me 12 installments to write about her? I say again, shame on me.
Stock Up
Amazing Wheat Grass - Really? We’re drinking grass now? I’ll take healthy eating stereotypes for $200, Alex. This is like a bad commercial for a casual dining establishment. Like the family goes to the health food restaurant and everyone is drinking grass, then the dad makes a stupid face so the family goes to Flingers for some jalapeno poppers or something instead. Ugh.
Blogapalooza References - This is pretty much the social event of the summer. I’m looking forward to this almost as much as the season finale of Real Housewives of New Jersey. Healthy Twilight Pancake had a nice post about it where she asked readers which bloggers they wanted to meet. I almost signed in under random names to stuff the ballot in my favor.
Free Shiz - Not for me, but there are some contests worth mentioning. The Professional Vegan is giving away some books…Fast Food Nation and Food Inc. I didn’t know they wrote books about those movies, but you can find out the details here. In other free shiz news, Kori at All things B is giving away some of that Amazing Grass in this post. In other news, I’m going to mow my lawn on Saturday before we leave town, so I’ll be having a grass giveaway as well if you want to come over and pick up the clippings. It’ll save me some raking.
Summer haircuts - I’d like to think that this is because I got my fro cut off last week, but I doubt I’m really a trendsetter here. Post-Graduate Meghannnn and birthday girl Jenna were among the multiple bloggers who got ‘em all cut this week. Am I really talking about the hair cutting schedules of people I’ve never met before. What the hell is wrong with me? But if I meet them all at blogapalooza, it won’t be quite as creepy, right?
Stock Down
Mean Anonymous Comments - Actually there have been way too many of them recently, but I give them a big thumbs down. If you want to be a wanker and get into a comment pissing match, go to a political or news blog or something. Anonymous mean comments on food/health blogs are just dumb. Props to Fitnestestinesstia and her pilot on the way they handled this one. Critical comments are okay. Just leave your name so we can engage in a healthy dialogue. Or so I can leave a flaming bag of poo on your doorstep.
Gluten - I really don’t know what gluten is, but people seem to be avoiding it. I could google it and find out what it is, but I’m a firm believer that for everything I learn, I forget another thing, and I don’t want to forget anything, And please don’t try to educate me via comments, or else I’ll forget my 2nd grade teacher’s name.
Soy - People seem to be anti-soy this week as well. I’m alright with that, as long as it just means I should avoid faux meat (like Soy Burgers and Soy Sausage). Consider it done. But don’t make me give up my soy sauce and edamame. Can we make an exception there?
Foods that end in consonants - I’m not sure why, but there have been lots of posts about foods that end with vowels. A prime example of this is Rose’s Frittata and Scone post. That’s a double word score. Keep in mind that Pat and Vanna are going to charge you $250 apiece for those.
Alright friends. That’s all I’ve got. See you in a couple of weeks. We’ll try to do better next time.
Obviously, have a good vacation and all that jazz. Take some pictures and post them for crying out loud!
I really wish I could have seen your performance at Dr. Dre. Will there be a repeat at the Summit? You should be in charge of organizing that.
Also, you obviously did not see Mark’s hair transform from mohawk to frohawk this week or that would definitely been on the “Do” list for summer cuts!
Oh..
Iced Dongs.
My day just got..100 times better.
You had me laughing out loud a few times here … love the C ‘n’ C blogging factory and Healthy Twilight Pancake.. too funny. Hope you have fun in Mexico!
Also just checked out your picture page … can’t believe you met Phyllis!!!
Cabo!! Have a great time, I had myself some very memorable Spring Breaks down there! Good times.
ohh. cabo. have a killer time.
Soy-based condiments totally don’t count as soy in my book. Live it up with some stir-fry.
Have fun in Cabo–just don’t bring back any swine flu;)
hilarious. as usual
no grass drinking ever - i dont care how “in” it is - HAVE A GREAT VACATION - drink LOTS of tequila!
I hate to admit it, but I really don’t know what gluten is either! I have even tried to research it and am still clueless on what the hell gluten is. All I know is that if a package say gluten free then that means no gluten right? I am pretty much everything else had gluten in it…lol…
Oh and you forgot to give me the shoutout for being the greatest blogger in the land. hello… I thought we had a deal?
lol
“Karen, you can’t just ask people why they’re white.” Mean Girls is my favorite movie ever. I made a shirt for my sister that say “that’s so fetch” on it. still didn’t make fetch happen, damn.
i liked your comments about the grass giveaway haha. you have it admit, it was kinda a natural progression, going from spinach in smoothies to grass in smoothies.
Have fun on vacation!
p.s. Have fun in Cabo!
I’m thinking that dive bars in the D wouldn’t let you sing Dr. Dre songs and if they do, I’m not sure you’d want to pick that one. I think I would pay money to see you all do karaoke!
Have fun in Cabo! Try to remember it!
Hangry Heather - Not sure if Dre will make an appearance at Blogapalooza. I was thinking maybe House of Pain or Marky Mark, given the venue.
Jocelyn - Here you go again…Iced Dongs. Are we up to 200x better now?
Amanda - Yes, Phyllis and I bonded. I think I even got a side hug
Meghann - as long as we stay ignorant about gluten, we can’t develop an allergy, right? Everyone I know with a gluten intolerance knows what it is…so I choose ignorance. How’s that for flawed logic.
Jane - I want that shirt. Or else I’ll write about you in my burn book.
have fun in cabo! I will be in mexico next week also, I’m really hoping I don’t get the swine either.
Have a good time in Cabo. I’m not sure who will recap the food blog world for me with you gone, but I’m going to try to get one of my cats to do it. They won’t be as good as you, though. Hey, is Gilbert staying with one of his relatives while you are gone?
So does this mean if I send you free shiz, I’ll get top billing? That’s a deal I’m willing to negotiate.
iced dongs - what a great way to start my friday.
Great recap, and I tagged you yesterday, too! Check it out - I even posted the butt imprint on my couch to show everyone where the blogging magic happens.
Have fun in Cabo!!!
NateFace! I am incredibly honored to be mentioned this week. You have no idea. I’m also glad my humor is amusing to some, if not offensive to others. Oops. Can’t help it sometimes. Anyway, have an amazing time in Cabo, and please wear sunscreen and drink 1 or 5 margaritas/tropical cocktails for me per day.
HEY! First time blogstalker-stalking, but just wanted to say hi since I’m a newbie and am enjoying your blog! LOVE your sense of humor, though it’s awkward when you work in a verrry small office and have to try not to smile at “nothing”. Anyway you will be duly added to the Google Reader and I will let you amuse me on a regular basis - after you get back from Cabo, that is - HAVE SO MUCH FUN! As for my own blog, yesterday I posted a list called “You might be a health blogger if…” You might get a kick out of it (and everyone else’s additions). Plus there’s a giveaway involved!
iced dongs.. totally yummy. at my sisters bachelorette party we toasted to BBCs…. and had a huge chocolate frosted cake in the shape of you guessed it!!!!! if you ask me i’ll tell you what BBC is- but its too innapropriate for the general population to hear- i dont want to influence the youngun’s..
have fun in cabo!
Haha! Love that you used the word “dong”!
dongs and wangs and wheatgrass!!!
Also, I lmao at “why they wrote books about these movies…”
Brillz. Have fun in Cabo!
Hey Nate,
I’m sure you already know since you are a Today Show and Real Housewives fan but Real Housewives from all cities are hosting the 4th hour with Hoda next week. Enjoy!
What are we going to do without you next week?
I was hoping you’d comment on the haircuts! Healthy Twilight Pancake and dong cupcakes… ha! I’m tired of the Blogapalooza tease! I wanna know, now.
Hey, wait, did you ever get the WholeSoy coupons I sent you? That’s some free shiz!
Have a great trip…see you next fall. Or something like that.
LOL - Kate is so good for creating blog content!
Thanks for the shout out Nate! I should put you in touch with my grass lady and maybe you two could work something out.
With the amount of times the word “dong” has been mentioned in the comments alone, I’m foreseeing a Dong Stock Up for your next post! Have a goo vaca!
Nate,
Glad the doctor’s appointment went well, and I hope you have a wonderful time in Cabo…I’m jealous. Make sure to pack your Amazing Wheat Grass powder - gotta keep that immune system strong. No swine flu for you my friend.
Waz happenin’ docta Dre? You bet I read that epic post by B+B and liked how she a) stole your SmartOnes pasta dish and b) pimped da sh!t outa it. Kelsey should start a weekly [intoxicated] post called Pimp My Bowl. Also, was your pops like Coach Carr from Mean Girls who told homies, “Don’t have sex, because you will get pregnant and die!…OK, now everybody take some rubbers.” Because that would mean your dad reminds me of my “Women in Relationships” class I took junior year where “SEX MAKES BABIES” was written on the chalk board and was never to be erased. And what the hell is the Blog Summit exactly?! I have seriously read over two dozen times from numerous folks that “I’m going to do the elliptical for 45 minutes..then work on the blog summit!!!!!!” Will someone please inform homegirl when, where, what, what the beeeeeeeep is happenin? AND, SNACKFACE is my HOMEGIRL! I loved that phallic commented about McDougal and I love her VegNews face. HAVE FUN IN CABOWABO! I want to hear stories about Nate and Kate bustin’ a move at EL SQUID ROE yo yo yo!!
Kind of sucks that soy is getting a bad rap–but better soy than a lot of other processed junk is what I’m thinking, right?
I thought it was bad that my mom was my Spanish teacher! You win the awkward parental situation of the year award! Though if you can handle that, you can handle anything, even mean anonymous comments!
Recipes - Gilbert’s grandparents are staying with him next week. He’ll be spoiled
Anna - Yep. That’s how it works. As long as it isn’t amazing grass or greek yogurt
SnackFace - Yes, it is quite an honor.
Mariposa - The use of chocolate frosting gave away the meaning of the second B. The first B and the C were never in question. I think we’re on the same page.
JB - I know!!!! It made me consider changing my vaca plans.
Homegirl - I know what you mean about the blog summit tease. Let’s give the blogfathers (or mothers) one more week to give details. If they don’t, then we’re going to consider ‘working on the blog summit’ to be some sort of euphemism - akin to “dropping the kids off at the pool” or “talking to a man about a horse.” So one more week to give us logistics, or else “working on the blog summit” becomes code for something. You and I get to decide what it means. Sound good?
was it weird to tell strangers about my lack of pants wearing? my mom reads the blog and she hasn’t called me in horror yet so it must not be too bad
Y’all would know what gluten is if you read my blog!
Homer: How is education supposed to make me feel smarter? Besides, every time I learn something new, it pushes some old stuff out of my brain. Remember when I took that home winemaking course, and I forgot how to drive?
Super Caloric - She’ll probably call before she comes over for a visit.
Matt - You still blog? Don’t get cocky just because you did your White Russian post yesterday…before that it had been 41 days without an alcohol related post. We can’t let that happen again.
Bah! I didn’t realize I did that!
Your stock is soon to be bullish (torro-ish?) as you have 10 days in the sun.
Have a great trip!!
http://ohlivin.wordpress.com/
Nate: you are hysterical. I totally thought you were going to call us all out on making Jenna’s pizza dough last week though! I did a whole post on pizza…I should have sent it to you so I can have some stalker-love too. haha.
Have a great vacation!!
First time reading. Ha. Your funny. Haha, and clever.
~Justine
haha I just re-read this and noticed the C n’ C music factory joke. good one.
Please go read my blog so you can make fun of me next! : ) It would be like making it on The Soup if I was a celebrity!
I think i’ve seen this somewhere before…but it’s not bad at all
cant waiiiiiiiiiit for the next post..
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